Monday, April 27, 2009

Swine Flu FAQs

"Will my non-swine flu vaccine work on the swine flu?

NO! Shut your hole, don't be so fuckin' stupid!

"Is it okay to eat bacon?"

Fer'christsake!

"I have some pork-belly futures?"

ARRRGGGGHHH!

"You know how some men are just pigs..?"

Oh man. Selling tickets to Euthanasia ought to be legal! I swear!

"I have faith that disease is caused by demons, will that help?"

Shut yer HOLE!

"Hey, it says in the Gospels.."

Shutthefuckup!

"One time Jesus cast demons into pigs, waitwaitwait, AND the Jews won't eat it! Co-incidence?"

(speechless)

9 comments:

Pliny-the-in-Between said...

I'm guessing you didn't get these from the NIH or CDC websites ;)

Asylum Seeker said...

"Will my non-swine flu vaccine work on the swine flu?"

LOL.

mac said...

"One time Jesus cast demons into pigs, waitwaitwait, AND the Jews won't eat it! Co-incidence?"
-------------------

Pigs are smart, ya know?
Maybe that's why Jews don't eat them. I understand that. I don't like the idea of eating smart critters either.

BUT, pigs are just too tasty. Victims of their own juicy goodness!

oneblood said...

On a more pragmatic note, I wonder if this will start any changes (however small) in Mexican health codes?

Their cultural awareness of what cleanliness does is not just a cliche unfortunately.

Stacy S. said...

Hahahahaha! :-)
Thanks for the laugh PBoy.

Stacy S. said...

http://xkcd.com/574/

(comic)

mac said...

tayler told me a good one yesterday,


Peole said pigs would fly before a black man was elected president of these here United States.

Well, Obama was elected. One Hundred days into his term -SWINE FLU

oneblood said...

That was great. I love puns.

Harry C Pharisee said...

I was speaking in tongues when I had a new revelation in the form of a question. It's very profound. And of course it would be, I'm a Pharisee!

"Mairzy doats and dozy doats and liddle lamzy divey, a kiddley divey too wouldn't you?"

The copyright I obtained, allows me to charge you for posting it on your blog (even once)! That'll be a nickel buster. Ahh money, it's what everything holy leads to.